Thanksgiving is officially over.  Only half the leftovers remain and I have my eye on them for pocket pies.  The eating frenzy has continued days past the actual holiday.  Today, breakfast was “Grandmother Elkins Caramel Cake”.  Lunch was chips and dip.  Dinner was an amazing Thanksgiving strata (think everything on the plate smushed into layers and casseroled).    Not good for my goal of eating less, not good at all.

I frequently turn to food as my drug of choice, this holiday I was like an alcoholic spending her days in a vat of Jack Daniels.  I, shockingly, found no need to medicate.  I was happy.  I was full.  I was satisfied.

Aside from aching joints and a second trimester belly, I remain disturbingly in good health despite my eating frenzies.  I can be thankful that I still have a chance to right this ship and set her on a course for greener pastures and slimmer silhouettes.

At the blog, The Story Project, Ashley Beaudin, describes how she is building a better relationship with food.    Check it out here: Food and I Have An Ugly Relationship

When I read the blog, for the third time, one line stood out in three-dimensional relief: “I am not going to starve and heart doesn’t need donuts and pop to survive.” I am still dubious on pop not being necessary.  However, the two points remain powerful.

First, I am not going to starve.  Even if all the food suddenly disappeared from my house today, I have enough reserves in my body to last a very, very long time.

Second, my heart doesn’t need junk to survive.  It needs the divine embrace of grace.  It needs to laugh and chase kids.  It needs sleep.  It needs to play and pray with friends.  It does not need donuts.

It’s my relationship with food which is the problem.  It’s my relationship to myself and the role food plays in it which is the real source of the challenges.

As the holidays continue to barrel towards me like an Accela train, I believe I will gift myself something.  I’ll give myself the gift of loving myself more abundantly and praying more so that I can finally-eat less.

What gift will you give your heart this holiday season?