Argue Going to Stop Arguing?

Mornings are miserable. My children have a habit where they mess up all carefully made preparations the night before.

As the morning whine began to rise, I replied to the faux teary-eyed 6 year old and grouchy 10 year old, “I am choosing not to argue with you about this.” I walked away.

It was one of the best mornings yet.

Got me thinking. What other arguments am I having in my life, my work and my spirit?

My life is messy, unpredictable and chaotic. I forget what is most important and obsess over the little things. Time to stop arguing with the chaos.

My life is a game time decision. Cancer, pre-adolescence, basketball practice and politics of a small Christian school all call audibles to my time and patience. Yet, even the best games have a playbook. I need to work on a playbook-a family playbook. Routines where it’s possible, grace where it is not. Systems where they fit and humor when it does not.

In my work I need to stop arguing points I am powerless to pursue. Better to take all that passion and pour it into doing things above expectation. Under-promise then OVER deliver, that’s an argument I can win in the Board room.

In my spirit…now this is the tough one. There are arguments birthed from my earliest memories-so thick they seem to coat my DNA. Some are arguments I’ll never scratch into a screen, they are too deep, too raw and too ugly.

Here’s one argument I’ll walk away from. God loves me…whether I like me or not…whether you like me or not.

So, dear one, ar-gue (pun intended) going to stop arguing? What will you walk away from? Share with me. And, because I don’t write it enough, thanks for letting me share with you.


  1. LaDonna Cole

    Love this blog, as usual. You should write more. Argue going to start? I have had an ongoing argument with my son. We are both entrenched on our opposite sides of the coin. We can’t even bring up the topic anymore, neither one of us is going to budge. So I chose to end it. If he doesn’t want to fill his tank up before it’s running on fumes, then he will have to suffer the consequences. 😀


  2. Melissa

    Walking away and not engaging…yes…much easier said than done! I am constantly at battle with my darling, stubborn 11 year old! Hmmm….could it be in the genes?? 😉 I sometimes “forget” who the parent is. But, with time, it will get better. I remember a wise man once telling me…”the key to happy kids is being firm, fair and consistent”…that is a mantra I am constantly working on!


  3. Katie Cross

    WOw- good for you. I think learning how to choose your battles is a great skill that everyone could benefit from. There are somethings worth fighting for, and there are somethings that aren’t. I think identifying those is the hardest part.


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