Received a text from a friend today.
“Is something wrong? Haven’t heard from you.”
I immediately called her and we had a frank and honest conversation. I apologized for making assumptions. I decided she couldn’t possibly want to spend time with me individually if we already would be in the same place for a group gathering. I was wrong.
She assumed I was mad or she had done something. She was wrong.
We talked it out and planned to schedule some time as soon as we could. I felt loved abundantly.
Loving abundantly means sometimes asking the hard questions. Questions like, “What is going on with you?”. It also means being willing to do the work to arrive at the answers.
Recently my absolute, iron-clad assumption that I am unworthy of or good at friendships has come crashing to the ground. A very determined and long-suffering group of people have quietly chipped away at the foundation. They simply do not permit me to fade into the background. They do not hear excuses and will show up on my doorstep, children in tow, for a cup of coffee and some peanut butter banana toast.
It’s easier to let things slide. To inhale the intoxicating scent of passive aggression and simply fade away. It’s easier, however, it’s not loving abundantly.